You Told Me You Loved Me

[jessicagallagher]

Originally published at constant-casualty.net. You can comment here or there.

You know, I wish I could be one of those people who posts things on their blogs numerous times a week.  Then I wouldn’t feel like I’m wasting my money with this place.

The world keeps spinning and I keep moving, and yet it feels like I’m not really getting anywhere.  Every year I think I’ve said to myself “by this time next year, I want to be living in my own place.”  And every year, I say it again.  I was caught making the same goal a few weeks ago to Simon after realizing that I’m actually a twenty-six year old married woman living in my mother’s basement.  Whenever I come to this realization, all I can think about is the 50-something neighbor we had living next door to us.  He had never had a girlfriend, and he lived in this two-bedroom apartment next to us with his mother.  Until she died.  And now he lives with his brother.

I will not become this.  Granted I’ve passed the never-had-a-girlfriend part (er… boyfriend), but I think it may make it even a little more pathetic that I’m married and still living at home.  But hey, at least there were two years of my life that I lived on my own, before being forced back into my old bedroom due to a psychotic ex.  And I was living with my grandmother when I was 19… So I guess I wasn’t always at home.

I just realized that I had typed in the subject before I even realized what I was going to write about and now it makes no sense at all.  I just happened to be listening to that song when I opened Wordpress.  Look at me, being so original and creative like.

I really should get dressed.  It’s kinda chilly down here.  I promise I’ll write something worthy of being read sometime in the near future…